You know how, in the business world, there’s an impossible standard for women? That one where if you’re too nice, you’re a pushover who can’t get the job done and if you’re getting shit done, you’re mislabeled aggressive and routinely called a bitch? While – at the exact same time in the exact same company – men doing the exact same things are called assertive and seen as leaders?

We have that in weddings, too. There’s an impossible standard here, but what it boils down to is this:

Weddings Are No Exception to the Gendered Division of Emotional and Meta Labor
It should come as no surprise that emotional labor is part of every wedding. Weddings are centered around living up to social expectations, managing people’s feelings, and making people comfortable. I’m sure you’ve already reached the not-at-all-shocking conclusion that women are doing the majority of the emotional labor for weddings, just as in everyday work and home life.